Dooce Gets Sued

In what looks to be yet another warning for bloggers, Heather Armstrong announced today that she was not only fired for her website (hence the term, “dooced”), but also sued for it! What is wrong with the world?! (Actually, the world is fine, it’s the people in the world who are pissing me off.)

Now, since I’m not a reputable news source, I can postulate that the contract she mentions in her post today has something to do with her site, because, if it doesn’t, it’s just plain not as newsworthy.

Remember Kevin Nealon on Saturday Night Live? “And that’s news to me!”

You go, Heather. That’s all I have to say about that. I offered to help with a sit-in for her, should the need arise. I figure that 1) it’s on my new lifetime “to do” list, which is still in the draft stages and will be posted shortly, and 2) I bet she really deserves it.

But, for now, good night. And have a pleasant tomorrow.

Genetic Savings & Clone

(Or, “With a Name like This, How Did it Even Stand a Chance?!”)

“Cat-Cloning Company to Close Its Doors” (AP – San Francisco, Oct. 12, 2006)

My favorite sentence of all time in news releases, by the way, is “So-and-so did not immediately return telephone calls,” which is a handy-dandy way of getting out of printing any type of rebuttal or explanation, as far as I’m concerned. I should know. I did it myself in college and wound up in the dean’s office for it. (A story aptly titled “Tough Turkey in Marriott?” that I’m still very proud of, as you can see. It was probably the only time that anything I wrote actually did any bit of good, but college students had Thanksgiving dinner that year, dammit! And I’m proud of it.)

Back to the topic at hand, though, I’m wondering how soon is “immediately”? Immediately or within five minutes? Too funny. As if anyone returns phone calls “immediately.” Better to just be honest and say, “We really didn’t want to give Mr. Sorry Sap a chance to talk about this and wanted to get the ‘news from our point-of-view’ out as quickly as possible.” Now that’s honesty, people!

Oh, Be Careful Little Fingers What You Say

News from down South today has me rethinking some of the horribly nasty things I’ve said about people on this blog. Please accept my most humble apologies, horribly nasty people. I’m sure that I didn’t really mean it and could plead insanity if I really had to. Before you go and sue me, understand that I will show up in court with my lawyer — I have several — and will most likely countersue you for hurting my feelings. Boo hoo.

News from The Foo (or, news you can fooze)