In the last week or so, my seven-year-old daughter has asked me about homosexuality (mine in particular — i.e. if I were gay, would Tina — a woman I work with — and I be married), whether or not the Tooth Fairy is a real fairy or if it’s just parents masquerading as one (fortunately, she let me off the hook when she said that if it’s the parents that she doesn’t want to know just yet) and whether or not I thought the Remain Inn was a good name or a stupid name for a hotel.
The conversation went something like this:
Babs: “I think the Remain Inn is a stupid name.”
Me: (driving and having no clue what she’s even saying because it takes me at least three tries to understand that she’s saying “Remain Inn.”) Huh?
Babs: “I think the Remain Inn is a stupid name.”
Me: “The what?”
Babs: (getting annoyed and slowing down her speech so I can finally understand) The Re-main Inn.
Me: (acting like I know what she’s talking about – a favorite ruse until I figure it out) Why’s that?
Babs: Because who wants to stay somewhere where you have to re-main there?! That’s stupid.
Me: (catching on as I finally notice the hotel sign out the car window) I agree. They should probably name it something else.
Babs: Yeah.
Note to self: continue working on reverse psychology technique with Babs, who definitely takes after her father and feels an enormous amount of resistance to anything foisted upon her or otherwise remotely suggested. Take stop signs, for instance. More like a suggestion, really. Pirate.
