Archive for March, 2008

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Because sometimes we all need a pep talk

March 31, 2008

Wisdom from those who know more than I: (And here’s hoping that General Patton can somehow let me know from the Great Beyond which time in my life this is!)

Fear is just your feelings asking for a hug.

~Danielle Sanchez-Witzel and Michael Pennie, My Name is Earl

I have accepted fear as a part of life – specifically the fear of change…. I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that
says: turn back.

~Erica Jong

Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.

~Author Unknown

If a man harbors any sort of fear, it percolates through all thinking, damages his personality and makes him a landlord to a ghost.

~Lloyd Douglas

Anything I’ve ever done that ultimately was worthwhile… initially scared me to death.

~Betty Bender

There is a time to take counsel of your fears, and there is a time to never listen to any fear.

~George S. Patton

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Because this found me today and spoke to me

March 25, 2008

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.”

Helen Keller: Author, activist and lecturer

Here’s to a daring adventure, everyone!

everest4.jpg

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Better than Windex!

March 21, 2008

For those of you who spend a lot of time at the computer, you may be interested in this screencleaner.

https://emp.ucsd.edu/swf/screenclean.swf

Hope it helps you the way it helped me! Cheers!

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I love multiple choice

March 18, 2008

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that’s the only trip the establishment would let it take.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken “crossed” the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road”. And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross the road? I mean, why doesn’t anyone ever think to ask, “What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?”

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Rather, it is, “Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste toobserve the chicken crossing?”

DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road. It transcended it.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

MICHAEL SCHUMACHER: It was an instinctive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn’t see the road until he had already started to cross.

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

BILL CLINTON: “I did not have an improper relationship with that chicken.”

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Because today, everyone who wants to be Irish is!

March 16, 2008

irishtoken.jpg

Happy St. Patrick’s Day, everyone. If anyone drinks green beer, I want to hear about it!

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Life lessons from the Little Engine That Could

March 14, 2008

I think I can; I think I can; I think I can.

“The strongest single factor in prosperity consciousness is self-esteem: believing you can do it, believing you deserve it, believing you will get it.”

Jerry Gillies: Author and workshop leader

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More random things I am learning

March 14, 2008

If you actually own your own garage and don’t want to have to scrape ice in the mornings, don’t leave your car in the driveway overnight when it’s raining and the temperatures drop below 32.

Signing up to cook twenty pounds of potatoes on a week when you’re sick is not the world’s greatest idea.

Giving your phone number out (or calling someone with caller ID) you don’t know means that they will have your number for as long as you do.

Directly related to the above, you have no control over how many times they use that number, but you do have control over whether or not you give it out in the first place. (And, yes, for those following along, he is still calling — two-and-a-half weeks later. I have not answered once.)

And perhaps the single most important thing I have learned this week: Cheetos taste better when you eat them while soaking in the tub by candlelight with a glass of Merlot.

Important stuff. I know.